Monday, January 15, 2007

im jesus, and im here to install your cable

i think every cable installer i deal with is successively worse. and by worse, i mean one step closer to jail time (if they havent already spent some time in the joint. by the way, been there twice - aint that bad)
the latest guy's name was angel or jesus or jose or something. lets call him angel salivar, b/c thats what i choose to call him. this guy has to be fewer than 2 years away from multiple children, multiple diseases, multiple convictions, and teardrop tattoos.
he was nice enough (hell, he even shook my hand when he finished. i was hesitant to shake it, for the record...the reasons may or may not be given by the descriptions)
first of all, he was doing the ghetto

i dont know all the proper designations, but angel was best described as a cholo. look it up if you need to. he had the ghetto talk, the sagging jeans, the wifebeater, and most importantly, the greasy/wispy facial hair.
for whatever reason, these guys always wanna be my best friend. it reminded me of the guy who towed my car this summer when my alternator went out and told me about all the illegal shit he had done and how he's been out of prison since whenever.
just not my kind of people, yet we have an instant rapport apparently...not a good sign for my future. maybe this is why no one wants to hire me (cue the violins)
he managed to ask me if i go out to clubs much, and i sorta danced around that one, and he told me about one night when he supposedly blew 600 bucks on "strippers, weed, coke, n all that shit" -- now, im no genius, but if youre blowing 6 hundo in a night, you probably should have more income than from installing cable. perhaps he slings crack rock (or has a wicked jump shot)...either way, i didnt need to know

while he was here, he asked if he could use the bathroom. i wanted to say no, of course.
what's the etiquette here? what if you say no? are they gonna fuck you over on the installation? do they hold it? drive to a convenience store and come back? i feel like theres some social contract whereby we are obligated to let them use the restroom and they will give us a proper installation.
would it be inappropriate to ask if it is for #1 or #2?
i imagine most people would be willing to hold it, but how pissed would you be if some disgusting installation guy dropped a mad deuce in your toilet? you'd have to move or get a new toilet
maybe next time this happens, you should be safe and ask...or just respond "yeah you can use it as long as its just #1"

--just tell them 'mister' said so--

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