gym etiquette: lessons 29 & 30

1. hey, ray charles, take off the fucking shades bro. youre inside. on an elliptical trainer. it isnt bright, and there's no wind sheer to account for. i could almost let it slide if you were running for like an hour on a treadmill bc then i could at least dismiss it to you trying to get used to running with shades on...but its like larry david said "only blind people and assholes wear sunglasses inside." fucking perv
2. when did it become okay to go tanning and then hit the gym? do yourself and everyone else a favor and go after the gym, or at least rinse off afterwards. i know my workout is taken to a whole new level when you prance by smelling like malibu rum and burned hair. asshole

for those of you who think i am racist or misogynistic, i will gladly state for the record that these offenders were both caucasian males...not that it should matter b/c this shit is offensive, regardless of gender or race

--nooch