Well, It's Official... I Can't Have Children
Ok, just because there's an info-mercial on, we're gonna talk about this...
Girls Gone Wild. (or as my fraternity brothers lovingly referred to it, "GGW")
I know -- that's all it took. You're totally committed to this rant now. No question. You are going to read this. And that's an important point. Because THAT is why I have to write this. The infomercial came on... I coulda turned it off. (yea right...) I mean, I don't know about you, but I see "Paid Programming" on my guide, and I just pass right on by. But the key thing here is that I saw the GGW logo... and that was it... here I am... committed...
This is truly amazing, GGW. It's a phenomenon. Here's the thing...
Girls. We all know they'll do this "shit" (meaning, they get awesome). It's a given. We know. You sit here and you watch this very real life documentary (What? Maybe your life sucks, but this is pretty close to mine) and you're thinking to yourself, "Who would do this? And why?" Then it goes on for a second and you think, "Why don't I know these girls? I've never met these girls. I go out. I get jiggy, I get down! Where are these girls?" (And even if you ARE a girl, you're still thinking... where are these girls? I would never do this, and my friends would never do this. We all laugh at these girls. How stupid are they?) Fair enough.... but then you're watching, and you're rewinding... and then you rewind once more... and then you put it on slow-mo..... Whatever. But you're watching it, and then it hits you... "Holy shit, I KNOW girls that would do this! Oh my god! I actually know someone, that if they did this, I wouldn't be surprised at all." (And again, even if you're a chick, you're thinking, "Fuuuuuuck, I can totally see my friend, so-and-so, doing this... I guess we DO do this stuff... Crap!") And then it's just like, "Wow, this is amazing. Cos I can totally see *this* person doing it.
Ok, I'm sorry, I really got off track there for a second. The thing here is this; Girls do this stuff. I mean, we know that they do, right. It's on TV, so you know it's true. Plus, as I mentioned above, we all know someone who is/could be doing this. We could get into a huge psych discussion about why, but who has the fucking time. I can't even make it to the gym in the morning. All we need to agree on is; they do it! So, here's my joint.
-- Women (yes, I am generalizing) are this way; no question. The real beauty of 'GGW' is that men have been capitalizing on this [mis]behavior for years... decades, even. We're all getting rich (read: flashed & blown) because of this type of awesomeness. So there's really nothing to talk about *there*. The substantial thing here is that a company (certainly run by men) figured out how profitable this could be (in monetary terms, not just ass -- obviously gay men). And now they're making millions of dollars. That is the real beauty. But how did they think of this?! I'm like, literally, angry. I've had girls flash me. (at least, I'm going to maintain that.) And I've had, "people" (girls, boys, and transgendered; post-op) blow me. So, I'm there with ya, GGW. But I'm not rich off of it! Did I do something wrong? I think not---
I think these fuckers are banking off of none-ass-getting suckers!
I mean, let's be honest, you guys [GGW] didn't create anything. Right? Women will act this way, regardless of cameras or free t-shirts. (just add alcohol) Anyone can go out and see this show -- forget buying the DVD. So 'GGW' didn't discover anything, right. It's not like they uncovered the cure for cancer. This is just miles and miles of oil reservoirs in the middle east; it's been there for a thousand years, and people have been pumping it -- you just figured out how to deliver it to the masses. Mainly, those who couldn't find it/don't have access to it. And, not to discount that -- Quite the contrary; let me be the first to say (on a blog) congratulations. Job well done. Props. But why?! How?!
Your video -- yeah, that's my life. And I'm not a cool guy (yes I am) and I'm just living the same life as every other Joe, (No, I'm not at all.. mine is much, much better) so why is a normal spring break/college party/night at my apartment worth buying on DVD?
Who knows? It's up there with, 'why will girls spit (let *it* get in their mouth) but not swallow?'
There is no answer... it just is...
Girls Gone Wild. (or as my fraternity brothers lovingly referred to it, "GGW")
I know -- that's all it took. You're totally committed to this rant now. No question. You are going to read this. And that's an important point. Because THAT is why I have to write this. The infomercial came on... I coulda turned it off. (yea right...) I mean, I don't know about you, but I see "Paid Programming" on my guide, and I just pass right on by. But the key thing here is that I saw the GGW logo... and that was it... here I am... committed...
This is truly amazing, GGW. It's a phenomenon. Here's the thing...
Girls. We all know they'll do this "shit" (meaning, they get awesome). It's a given. We know. You sit here and you watch this very real life documentary (What? Maybe your life sucks, but this is pretty close to mine) and you're thinking to yourself, "Who would do this? And why?" Then it goes on for a second and you think, "Why don't I know these girls? I've never met these girls. I go out. I get jiggy, I get down! Where are these girls?" (And even if you ARE a girl, you're still thinking... where are these girls? I would never do this, and my friends would never do this. We all laugh at these girls. How stupid are they?) Fair enough.... but then you're watching, and you're rewinding... and then you rewind once more... and then you put it on slow-mo..... Whatever. But you're watching it, and then it hits you... "Holy shit, I KNOW girls that would do this! Oh my god! I actually know someone, that if they did this, I wouldn't be surprised at all." (And again, even if you're a chick, you're thinking, "Fuuuuuuck, I can totally see my friend, so-and-so, doing this... I guess we DO do this stuff... Crap!") And then it's just like, "Wow, this is amazing. Cos I can totally see *this* person doing it.
Ok, I'm sorry, I really got off track there for a second. The thing here is this; Girls do this stuff. I mean, we know that they do, right. It's on TV, so you know it's true. Plus, as I mentioned above, we all know someone who is/could be doing this. We could get into a huge psych discussion about why, but who has the fucking time. I can't even make it to the gym in the morning. All we need to agree on is; they do it! So, here's my joint.
-- Women (yes, I am generalizing) are this way; no question. The real beauty of 'GGW' is that men have been capitalizing on this [mis]behavior for years... decades, even. We're all getting rich (read: flashed & blown) because of this type of awesomeness. So there's really nothing to talk about *there*. The substantial thing here is that a company (certainly run by men) figured out how profitable this could be (in monetary terms, not just ass -- obviously gay men). And now they're making millions of dollars. That is the real beauty. But how did they think of this?! I'm like, literally, angry. I've had girls flash me. (at least, I'm going to maintain that.) And I've had, "people" (girls, boys, and transgendered; post-op) blow me. So, I'm there with ya, GGW. But I'm not rich off of it! Did I do something wrong? I think not---
I think these fuckers are banking off of none-ass-getting suckers!
I mean, let's be honest, you guys [GGW] didn't create anything. Right? Women will act this way, regardless of cameras or free t-shirts. (just add alcohol) Anyone can go out and see this show -- forget buying the DVD. So 'GGW' didn't discover anything, right. It's not like they uncovered the cure for cancer. This is just miles and miles of oil reservoirs in the middle east; it's been there for a thousand years, and people have been pumping it -- you just figured out how to deliver it to the masses. Mainly, those who couldn't find it/don't have access to it. And, not to discount that -- Quite the contrary; let me be the first to say (on a blog) congratulations. Job well done. Props. But why?! How?!
Your video -- yeah, that's my life. And I'm not a cool guy (yes I am) and I'm just living the same life as every other Joe, (No, I'm not at all.. mine is much, much better) so why is a normal spring break/college party/night at my apartment worth buying on DVD?
Who knows? It's up there with, 'why will girls spit (let *it* get in their mouth) but not swallow?'
There is no answer... it just is...
posted by Big Shifta at 10/04/2005 12:29:00 AM
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