whats your name, whats your number, i would like to get to know you

what is the preferred nomenclature for:

strippers? i mean i usually call them "girlfriend" but if you call them strippers, do they act all offended and insist on being called "dancers"? what if you just called them glorified prostitutes, would they claw your eyes out and get bruno to rough you up in the alley?

speaking of prostitutes, what about them? are they hookers? prostitutes? working girls? streetwalkers? glory holes?

midgets? little people? dolphin callers? (yes i ripped that idea off from tucker max). vienna sausage fingers?

im insensitive and fairly glib, so i obviously have no concrete answers here.
i do know you're not supposed to call asian people "oriental" (which describes a type of rug, not a type of person)

...and im pretty sure you arent supposed to refer to black people as african-american, which is presumptuous and apparently fairly patronizing since most black people in america probably dont come from africa any more. i think ill stick with my grandma's tactics and refer to them collectively as "the black"